about

Roy Ivy Chicago, Illinois

Before moving to Chicago, Roy Ivy was a choirboy for The Polyphonic Spree and the drunken oaf leader of the perpetually doomed The Tah-Dahs.

But after a move to Chicago and a heinous divorce, he began compulsively writing and sloppily recording the songs you're hearing on Bandcamp.

"Imagine Jonathan Richman going to the dark side and stealing your drink. That's Roy Ivy"

– David Fricke
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Track Name: Tonight's Not The Night
guilty and horny
prickly and thorny
that's how i roll away
jumpy and thoughless
not making progress
another crime don't pay
Gettin all my hopes up cuz i heard that losers sometimes win.
bettin' on a longshot is my bootleg of original sin
free spin
Oh, don't lead me on if tonight's not the night
don't turn me on if tonight's not the night

burping and farting
scratching and couching
hell of a mating call
whinin and cryin'
cheatin and lyin'
i really dropped the ball

Rotting in my queue like a long neglected friend request
nothin' personal it's just been so long since i've been my best.

well not yet.
Track Name: I'm Not Very Smart
Cause innuendo goes out the window. It's just the glasses, I can't even write my name in the snow.
Track Name: I Wanna Dance With Somebody!
'm in my work clothes and i didn't bring a crew
Nobody wants to hang out on a tuesday night
but that's alright, i'm not your type, you know i'm not your type too
glad we're on the same page, don't care about your moves

cause when the cat's away the mice are playing video games
they wear the same t-shirt for days
and i came here alone and i'm leavin this way
it's okay to be lame when you know you're lame
Oh I wanna dance with somebody
who doesnt' give a shit about me
yeah, i wanna dance with someone i won't see again.
so step right on in.

so when did "cold as balls" enter my lexicon
it makes no sense, the climates different where i pitch my tent
don't mind your nasal townie accent, but i'd rather you were mute
tonight i'm looking less than cute, and it's on purpose

cause when the cats away, the mice ain't gonna bother to shave
they wear the same underwear for days
and i came here alone and i'm leaving this way
i've only just been delayed.
Track Name: i'm gonna feel it in the morning
well the first time i saw ya, i hoped it'd go like this
i'd rip off the whole wide world to steal that kiss
well i stole that kiss, you stole mine back, when we had the opportunity, when no one was looking
and that's what love is like for me.
that's what love's been like for me.
i'm gonna feel it in the morning.

well she yanked off my pants with the strength of a tard
and she flew off the bed and hit her head and we laughed so hard

with my whiskey dick and my bourbon balls
we still blew out the walls, down the hall the neighbors thought you were being murdered

and i don't mind that you keep your eyes open when we're kissing
cause i know for damn sure i won't see that look again.

so i'm stealing you from someone who won't put up a fight
and i feel like a bully cause he's so good and nice
we just spoiled any chance of an innocent beginning.

i'm gonna feel it in the morning.
Track Name: amazing face, i'm trying so hard not to like you
you're amazing you amaze me
and i weak at the knees
and i'm trying so hard not to like you
i adore you, and i crave you
and i'm trying to take it slow
but i know, it's so hard not to like you

say the right things, sing the right songs
you read my diary
and i'm thinking someone's meant for me
i'm so used to disappontement
i'm so sick of thin air
......
it's so hard not to like you
amazing face, sound sound sound
my heart just breaks when you come around round round
Track Name: My Generous Friend
don't wanna go steady
but i wanna go somewhere
gonna walk that fine line
between your thighs and your underwear
we got a lot in common
when your legs are in the air
and the way that you take me
it's way beyond compare

stay like this my generous friend.

but i don't wanna go steady
but i wanna go somewehre
you can call me your fella
if there's someobody you want to scare
you can call me your husband
if you bite your lip and pull my hair
i don't care

dont' wanna go steady, but i wanna go somewhere
i've got sparks shooting out my ass